Investment & Relationships

September 12, 2011

I often think about changing the name of this blog into, “Les in the finance”. I write a lot about relationships and sex. And relationships work a whole lot like investments.

"People thought I went on vacation but actually, I spent the summer lost in the sewers."

In trading, everyone wants the best possible return on their investment. We also look for the best possible return in our love life. “I gave you the best years of my life!” “If I wasn’t with you I’d be already married!” Valid anger when we don’t get what we’re promised. Even if that contract was entirely imaginary.

That return on your money is also weighed by the risk factor in each investment. Some of us keep just a few investments, but they are low risk. Sure, it may not be so exciting or spontaneous, but at least we are sure that the girl is not going to cheat or do anything crazy, right?

And some of us like to gamble with high-risk investments. We go after the straight girls, the girls already in relationships, the emotionally unavailable women. High risk also implies high payoff. It’s a thrill.

If you’re in this second group, pretend you’re an investment banker, or, at the very least, a hungover finance student. Diversify your portfolio. Some high-risk is okay – but make sure it’s not the only stock you’ve got. Take a look at some of the more stable securities. Play around with an older, established company instead of the hotshot young venture. Balance your 2 or 3 volatile stocks with a few solid and predictable ones.

Alternatively, some of the craziest success stories on the market come from betting it all on that one. Is listening to your intuition worth betting millions on something that looks very likely to fail?

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9 Responses to “Investment & Relationships”

  1. N said

    I tend to get high fluctuations and sudden drops in the shares prices… is it because I have to work harder on my annuities homework? :/

  2. Anonymous said

    Interesting commentary. This just gave me a new shift in perspective on love and career. Would I allow myself to be treated the way I am at my job in a relationship and vice versa? And what role am I playing in both of these? Writing this, I realize I’m more reactive (and possibly lack self confidence) in both areas and think I could be more go with the flow, creative, open, proactive etc as I am when I travel and connect with new people and experiences, which always ends up being more amazing than expected. Anyway, thanks for the insight!

    • Exactly! Many times we take on a role in our love lives that we would never allow ourselves in our career.

      At work, we’re encouraged to take some calculated risks, try out new jobs, apply to new positions, network, etc.

      But when it comes to meeting new women or dating, we are suddenly shy and are afraid to do anything outside of the status quo. Do you think it’s the way that we are socialized as women when growing up, or something else is to blame?

      • Anonymous said

        Hmm I need to reflect on this a little bit. You make a good point. I think part of it is socialization. We are never taught or learn how to acknowledge people, express ourselves fully and truthfully or how to stand in our own power (especially women). I think that’s the point. The “powers that be” don’t want people doing that because it makes it harder to “control” those types of individuals.

        Simple example – yesterday, I saw a beautiful woman walking her dog across the street and the thought entered my mind to tell her I thought she was beautiful. This is totally out of character for me to do with someone I don’t know at all (I’m actually a pretty good acknowledger otherwise). I think it’s nice to receive a compliment that doesn’t have an agenda behind it. As I thought about actually telling her, fear started to come over me about what the consequences might be. Maybe she would have actually appreciated it. I’m training myself to allow the latter thought to overpower the other (no matter how the situation actually turns out). Anyway, I didn’t do it. Strengthening my confidence in this area is still something I’m working out. It’s a healthy practice to express your truth on a regular basis, something I find easy in most areas of my life except this one, as of right now (see your other post on coming out 🙂 ) But if I want to meet new women, I’m going to have to step it up. 🙂

        Anyway, not to rant too much, there are so many points about this that are worth discussing! I think it’s good to have these conversations though, thanks for bringing it up.

        • Oh for sure! I agree that this is all socialization. We are raised to behave a certain way, as opposed to our hypothetical male mate.

          Actually, dating girls has allowed me to at least somewhat break out of the “this is what girls do” mindset. When I look back at it, 6-7 years ago when I dated men I must have been insufferable.

          Also, I liked your idea of just telling people compliments whenever you feel like it. Women, men, cute kids, dogs… Whatever it may be :).

  3. […] Which casual sexual relationship is the one for you What sex and finance have in common […]

  4. This.Is.Brilliant. As a girl who works in the finance/numbers sector I completely get this. You.Are.Brilliant.

    • Thank you! The one thing you can’t really tell when investing in women is whether this particular one will depreciate or appreciate with age. That’s a tricky one. What do you think?

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