A Libra girl is an especially interesting kind of a les. That is, if she even agrees that “lesbian” is the right way to describe her. If you’re trying to capture her heart, and she miiiight be into girls, and she miiiiight be a Libra – keep reading.

How to Keep or Repel a Libra Girlfriend.

A Libra girl is into flexibility. And exploration. And freedom. And no labels!

And why not make everyone talk about you while you’re at it?

Until she gets to pick her own label. Then it’s okay! Maybe. Does she need to make a decision now? Why can’t things just stay the way they are? They are perfectly okay now.

For looking like they can never make up their minds, Libras actually have whole books of Libra-rules in their pretty Libra-heads. The rules are very particular and you won’t understand. That Libra-rules compilation is kind of like an organic cookbook. Make sure you use the right ingredients first, and THEN we’ll talk about prep steps. These girls know you’re not quite ready for their way of life yet, so they won’t bore you with the explanations and just give you what you need at this particular point, but in the way that still meets the rules. The tofu turkey was probably invented for a Libra les vegetarian.

To seduce a Libra, tell her about your own rules. If you don’t have any, make them up! Make it seem like you have every state’s penal code in your head, and tell her tales of common-law cases. How you solved the case of the disappearing girlfriend or how you defended your messy partner will give her clues of what to expect and how to move around you. The more complicated, the better! The Libra Les needs to get lost in the entanglement before losing her guard.

Libras are very cautious. It’s not that they dislike making choices, they just hate doing something they can’t un-do. If they could choose to marry someone with the promise that at any point, they could return everything to the way it was when they were dating, they would! In a heartbeat. You can always convince a Libra to do something “just for fun” and “just to try”.  Tell her she can leave at any point, and she will stay till the end.

Libras are so very charming, diplomatic, and open-minded. They know exactly what to say in which company. These les girls are wonderful to take to a work party, and tend to get along with everyone’s parents.

However, do not argue with a Libra or question her judgment. Where a Virgo would thank you for the feedback and think of ways to make her cherry pie taste just like your mom’s, the Libra will explode. And if you prove her wrong, you are wrong. So don’t even start it.

In bed, Libra is the most explorative sign of the Zodiac. Nothing is quite off-limits. Don’t take her to Vegas with you, or you may find your $500 chip stuck where you least expected.

Libra is the one sign that probably doesn’t mind you sharing some of your sexual adventures with your buddies. If she looks good in your story, it’s on! Of course, you have to look good in your story, too. No one wants to date a loser, and least of all a Libra.

Being boring, making her look bad, and not going out with her are all good ways to get a Libra to leave. Negative comments and picking fights are another. No Libra is going to stay around for a fight. She has much more fun things to do! Here are the stages that she will go through when packing her bags.

Stage 1. So what if you didn’t iron your dress tonight – looking like a bum is en vogue this year, anyway. She loves you and all your imperfections just make you hotter in her eyes. She’ll just kiss you and hug you a tiny bit more.

Stage 2. Libra is still supporting you – as a charity case. She needs to practice her niceness skills, right? Why not on you? You’re around, anyway. So she’ll try. To be nicer. And maybe iron that dress of yours. So you don’t look like an idiot.

Stage 3. The Libra les starts to think psychology. She has little private psychoanalysis sessions with her friends. And the friends of her friends. And the friends of the friends of her friends, trying to figure out what’s wrong with you, with her, and how to fix it? She might go on a break with you. And then take you back. Nothing is definite here. Everything is, “working on our relationship”.

Stage 4. Closing the door. Quietly, sloooowly. No one’s peace need be disturbed. Everything will to be done with class. If you’re a Libra’s ex, you might not have even realized you are out of the picture until one day you try to find the key from her apartment, and realize you haven’t been there for a few months.

Sometimes, your Libra ex may come back into your bed. Just to cuddle, you know? No reason you two can’t still be friends. This is the girl that keeps a string of exes around as friends, and doesn’t get jealous if they end up liking each other at some point down the line. Her friends can do no wrong and if you get into this zone, all your romantic transgressions are in the past. Pretty memories and friendly talk is really not a bad way to end a relationship.

Will have a threesome with: Gemini and Taurus.

Would never experiment with: Capricorn and Cancer.

HotProf

June 8, 2011

I have a presentation and opportunity pitch tomorrow but I cannot concentrate at all.

I have this professor. Who’s 30 and hot and straight. Um, maybe “straight”. Incidentally, also my advisor.

We’ve been going for coffee. Nice, innocent coffee. Not “coffee”. Oh, and sometimes drinks. Also innocent, though half my class thinks we’re sleeping together. And we’re not.

Oh, my class made up a rumor about an orgy between me and her and her supposed gf and a guy in our class. The guy was supposedly just watching though. Well, that’s nice.

But we’re not sleeping together.

I’m not even sure I would want to.

Except… Today I found out that not only she used to be more promiscuous than me, she also had a much more varied experience. Up to this point *I* was the one in my group of friends with the most varied experience.

Basically, our lunch conversation led to me thinking about ropes in my last class. And our Whatsapp conversation was…. not very PG-13. And now I have a link to a private BDSM club.

Um, that was SO not what I was planning on learning in business school.

Friday Night Live

August 28, 2010

I was feeling adventurous last night, gathered my friends, and went to my favorite bar (referenced many times in previous posts).

Somehow all my women like to gather there?

As soon as we get the first drink, RedGirl shows up. Prehistory: we’re friends, we hooked up, she now has a boyfriend, she wanted to have a threesome, I wasn’t into the idea and I stopped taking her calls for a couple of months. And then we run into each other in Favorite Bar.. last night. It was nice to see her, she looked good. But I was busy talking to my other friends, and she acted a little embarrassed and ran away with her boyfriend. So, that was random.

Then.. The Bartender texts me. She comes over to Favorite Bar but we somehow miss each other. Around 3:00 a.m., we decide to have a cigarette outside of her apartment. We smoke. Talk about Hemingway and Muriel Spark. Turns out that her threesome idea ALSO involves a guy. Whyyyy? What is the attraction in that? I just don’t get it. And the guy was already sleeping over at her apartment. She apologized. We established that we want to be friends and occasionally sleep with each other… When no third parties are involved. Then we made out and I ran away.

She proposed to walk me home, but I called a friend instead. The Bartender was surprised: “So you just have random guy friends who will get out of bed to come walk you home?” Me: “Yeah, pretty much.”

3 is company?

August 27, 2010

Today, I was woken up by a text. “Can I get my books back? Also, would you be interested in a threesome with me and a friend?”

The text came from The Bartender. The Bartender has nice breasts and very good taste in literature. Apparently, she also likes threesomes. Who knew.

It seems like everyone is into threesomes lately. Over the last 3 years, I’ve had about 10 offers, from friends, co-workers, total strangers. RedGirl has been trying to convince me to do one for about half a year now. The Bartender’s offer is much more exciting than RedGirl’s, since it involves a third girl rather than a guy. But in general, I don’t get the hype.

Physically, it can be exhausting. Lesbians already go on for hours. If the regular average with your partner is 3 hours, think about doing it for 5-6 with another girl thrown in the mix. Next day, everything will hurt, you will have bruises on your upper thighs, bite marks on your neck, and chapped lips. Some of us actually have work to go to in the morning, and I don’t want to look like I’ve been run over by two trains in front of the CIO!

The quality of the sex does not necessarily improve with quantity. Splitting attention between two women might not make you a better lover. Just saying.

Threesomes are by nature voyeuristic. You are watching two people have sex in front of you. I realize that this is part of the kick. But, have you ever watched bad porn? What if you couldn’t turn it off? Your threesome may very well turn out similar to that experience.

More people is invitation to more insecurities. With just one partner, you can ignore the fact that her legs are longer than yours – after all, you got her in bed with you, didn’t you? With two girls as your partners, you start thinking – what if girl A really prefers girl B? What if they just want to be left alone? Even if you are very secure and confident, one of your partners might not be, and that will ruin the whole mood.

Which is not to say that a threesome couldn’t be an interesting new experience for you and your partners. But it’s not really as exciting as the adult films would have you think!